


Up in the air

by SquiggyGirl



Series: Inspired by Three's Company [2]
Category: Laverne & Shirley (TV)
Genre: Drunk Dancing, Drunken Shenanigans, Embarrassment, F/M, Inappropriate Behavior, Nervousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-17 07:01:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29467656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SquiggyGirl/pseuds/SquiggyGirl
Summary: Inspired by the 3's Company episode "Up in the air"  in which Jack takes Janet to a fancy party.  Afraid of flying he takes a tranquillizer and then has a drink... well it affects him to hilarious results.===========================================Similarly - in this story Lenny takes Laverne to a fancy party.... he does something similar and hilarity ensues.
Relationships: Laverne DeFazio & Lenny Kosnowski
Series: Inspired by Three's Company [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2164761
Comments: 2
Kudos: 1
Collections: 3's company episodes as done by L and S





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly I'm not sure where I'm going to be going with this - it may end up really dumb but sometimes my "muse" has no inspiration so she just writes dumb stuff. I'm not trying to copy the 3's company episode but just to have some of the behavior similar. My other stories that had 3's company themes seemed to end up 'ok' so hopefully this one will to. :) Hope you enjoy. If anyone has an idea for a story and wants to contribute to this collection by all means go for it. 
> 
> I know I'm more on the Lenny / Laverne stories than Squiggy although my name is "Squiggygirl" I'm using that name to honor David who I thought was an amazing and awesome actor.

Lenny sat at his kitchen table looking at the paper in front of him. Another fancy ball that he had to attend. As the Count of Koulakouski, he was obligated to attend these events and of course with the same girl he introduced to society at the ball Laverne DeFazio.

He remembered what happened the last time and he cringed. After she took that rose she dropped it due to the thorn and then chaos. He remembered her falling head over ass down the ramp. He knew it was not her fault and it happened so fast that he didn't even have time to feel embarrassed. She was horribly embarrassed though due to those rich snobs laughing at her. She ran to the bathroom and hid. Eventually she did come back out and danced with the Duke. He and Laverne ended up staying at that Hotel that night and sharing something he thought she'd never do with him. He had never told Squiggy nor had she told Shirley about what happened that night. They found out anyway when Laverne showed him the blue pregnancy test.......

"What's wrong Len?" Squiggy asked as he came out of the bathroom.

"There's an event I gotta go to this Saturday." he said.

"An event?"

"Yea another one of them Debutante Balls, more people being introduced to society. I have to be there."

"So what? Go with Laverne as you did last time."

"I know but...." he said and sighed.

"You are ashamed of her!" Squiggy said.

"Of course not!" Lenny said. "But things are different now"

"She's as big as a house this time?" Squiggy said.

"Hey she's carrying the 90th in line of the throne!" Lenny said.

"Are you afraid of what those snobs are going to say?"

"Yea. They already looked down on us. it's going to be way worse now that she's pregnant. I mean we're not married yet and those kinds frown on unwed couples who have babies." 

"Have you asked her yet?"

"I just got the invite."

"You'd better ask her Len. It is for Saturday!" 

Lenny nodded. "Hey Laverne I need to talk to you. I'll be right down."

Lenny took a deep breath. He walked to the girls' apartment. Laverne was lying on the sofa. "Len what is it. I'm 8 months pregnant here and I want this thing outta me!"

"I need you to go to the Debutante Ball with me on Satuday." he said.

"Len I'm 8 months pregnant - I can't go anywhere let alone a fancy party. If i had my way I'd be laying around completely nude." she said.

Lenny bit his palm.

"I-don't talk that way Laverne. You're getting me all horney" he said and panted a little.

"From the look of your pants - you're already horney"

Lenny blushed. "Oh no!" he said and went to the bathroom to calm himself down. Laverne was thankful Shirley was not home because Lenny was very loud.

He returned to the living area. "Ask Shirley to go with you. She's your friend too."

"Will she go with me?"

"Will who go with you where?"

"Shirley - Lenny needs a date to this debutante ball on Saturday. Since I cannot go obviously will you go in my place?" 

Shirley looked from a very pregnant Laverne to Lenny and shrugged. "Sure. Why not?" she said. "I'll have to talk to Squiggy to make sure he's ok with it."

"Why should Squiggy mind? Nothing is going on between us so why should you have to ask his permission?" Lenny asked.

"Common courtesy. I'm not asking permission I'm just telling him. He will wonder where I'm going." Shirley said.

Lenny nodded in agreement.


	2. Chapter 2

The Night of the ball...

A few hours before they left for the event Laverne was moaning and groaning and cursing.

"UGH why is this baby still inside me!" she moaned.

"Coz it's only been 8 months Vernie. Not time yet." Shirley said and put a wet towel on her best friend's forehead.

"I'm so damn hot!" Laverne complained.

"It is a mite hot ain't it." Shirley said. "Why not just lie around in your bra and panties. Nobody will be around to bother you. have a blanket to cover up if someone comes by."

Laverne nodded and did so. She lied on the sofa in bra and panties.

Lenny was upstairs getting ready for the ball. It was an important night for him. He was a little disappointed that he couldn't take Laverne but she was expecting a baby so he totally understood besides taking Shirley was the next best thing.

Shirley waved good bye to Laverne. "you have the number of the Pfister Hotel where we're at right - in case of an emergency?"

"In case of emergency I have that number plus Pop, Edna and Carmine's number. But I won't be calling Carmine as well I'm lying here in my undergarments!"

Shirley nodded, grabbed her purse and went to meet Lenny and the two of them went off to the ball.

Meanwhile, Laverne groaned again about being hot so she stripped off her bra and panties and lay on the couch completely nude. She began to feel a lot better.

================================================

Lenny and Shirley entered the ballroom arm in arm.

"Oh it's HIM, that weird count guy" muttered one of the guests. "Who's THAT girl he's with. it's a different girl than he was with before."

Lenny ignored the comments and went right for the punch.

Someone in the background snickered. "We don't want this riffraff here so I spiked his punch... He had no idea i poured some vodka in his glass before i poured the punch for him."

Unbeknownst to anyone though, Lenny had taken a tranquillizer due to his nerves. He was a beer drinker and ONLY a beer drinker. He had always known he had an aversion to any other alcohol and would get drunk extremely fast on anything but beer. His father was like that too. He had made that mistake of drinking vodka and Orange juice one day and after one drink he was on the floor totally drunk. Not something he wanted to relive.....

Shirley noticed something amiss about a half hour later. "What's wrong Len?"

"What are you talkin' bout shirl?"

"You're swaying and well um your shirt is unbuttoned." she said.

He rebuttoned it up and looked at her. "I'm fine" he said and took her by the hands and danced with her.

"Len, there is no music."

"Lets sing....then..." he said and began to belt out a tune terribly off key.

"Lenny!" Shirley hissed "what is the matter with you."

"I want you Shirl, right here right now"

Shirley knew that this wasn't the usual way Lenny conducted himself, especially in this sort of situation. Something was terribly wrong. She looked around and saw the others were just staring at him in disgust.

"Lenny! People are staring at you"

"Ya so." he said and started to dance again and flailed his arms like around.

"Oh my..." said a voice as to Shirley's horror Lenny started stripping. 

Shirley had to do something and fast. "Lenny we're leaving." she said and dragged him out of the ballroom. She managed to get his jacket from the cloak room and cover him up. 

"Whaz goin' on"

"We are leaving Lenny before you make a total fool of yourself" Shirley said.

"What u talkin' bout"

Shirley took Lenny to a mirror that was in the hotel lobby. He was in his underwear.

Lenny sobered up fast right then.

"OHMIGOD"

Shirley sighed and let the very embarrassed Lenny sob on her shoulders.

"I can never show my face around them ever again. I have no idea what happened. I never touched the alcohol!" 

"I can tell you what happened" said a voice.

"Duke?" Shirley said.

Lenny groaned. 

"I saw someone put something in your drink Lenny. I was about to say something but you had already taken a drink. it was too late...."

Lenny looked at him. "I-I" he sputtered.

The Duke cracked a smile. "I understand you're embarrassed, humiliated and wish it never happened. You certainly did put on a show for us."

"Hey Duke, you really ain't helping us" Shirley said.

"Didn't you one tell your friend Laverne that everyone has embarrassing moments they wish never happened?"

"Yes but this is different." Lenny interrupted.

"How is it different?"

"I was almost naked." Lenny said and groaned. "they are gonna laugh at me even more." 

The Duke chuckled. "I also said to Laverne that going back in there made her classy. If you Count Lenny, go back in there YOU are also very classy."

Lenny looked from the Duke to Shirley and then down at himself. "I'm still almost naked. Where are my clothes" 

The Duke nodded to someone and that person brought Lenny his clothes to which he managed a small smile and went into the bathroom to change. 

Fifteen minutes later he and Shirley returned to the ballroom. The person who had spiked Lenny's drink had been kicked out.


	3. Chapter 3

Laverne was in pain. 

"I want my Lenny!" she yelled and screamed.

Laverne was now in active labor and on the floor screaming in agony.

Squiggy had heard her screams through the dumb waiter and got Carmine and ran down to see the naked, pregnant Laverne writhing in pain. 

For once in his lifetime, Squiggy didn't make those noises at the sight of a naked girl... he just wanted to help her. He immediately called for an ambulance then Frank. They couldn't call Lenny as he was on his way back from the ball.

While awaiting for the others to arrived, Squiggy and Carmine managed to get Laverne into a robe. They wanted her to have some dignity when the others arrived.

Frank & Edna arrived and Edna knew that the baby was coming and coming fast.

"She's going to be giving birth very soon. She ain't going to be able to wait for the ambulance" Edna said. "I know these things, I've had five children.

Fifteen minutes later; Laverne was on the floor of her apartment with Carmine at her head and Squiggy pacing and waiting for Lenny. Frank was on the other side of Laverne to help her and Edna was there poised to deliver the baby as the ambulance had not yet arrived.

"I see them! I see them!" Squiggy said. "Len get down here now! she's having the baby"

Lenny almost fell down the stairs when he realized he was about to become dad. He ran to his girlfriends' side, replacing Carmine. 

Within moments, the baby was born. A beautiful baby boy. Joshua Leonard Frank was the name they chose.

"Laverne we have a baby." Lenny said. "I love you and our baby. Let's make this official. Mrs. Kosnowski" he said.

Laverne looked over at him. "Yes Lenny." was her reply.

The ambulance arrived and took mom and baby to the hospital. The others followed in Laverne and Shirley's car.

Shirley and Lenny never told anyone about the incident at the ball. After it happened the Duke had made an announcement about the jerk that spiked the drink and that Lenny did not deserve the humiliation so none of that incident was to be breathed to anyone outside the room. The culprit was banished from all further royal balls and threatened that if they spoke of it they would have more than just royal disgrace and banishment to deal with.


End file.
